…I’m a lovely girl in the states that absolutely adores your column and
your interest in sexually empowering women and educating them as well-
right on sister. I read your column online a couple weeks ago and saw
something my partner and I may like to try- the “pinch and roll”. I
don’t remember the name of the column, so I am having a bit of
difficulty searching for it. While I would love to be able to search
through all of your archived columns, there are some internet time
constraints for me. If you would be so kind as to pass that along to
me I would really appreciate it. Also do you have any speaking dates
soon in BC? I’ll be visiting some family for a few weeks and would
very much like to hear you speak.

Take care and thanks for helping with part of my sexual revolution.



…Dear Josey, Last year I wrote to you, worried about my sexuality because the only time I had ever orgasmed with a guy was while my boyfriend was dressed as a french maid. You offered advice on a couple of possibilities that didn’t involve me necessarily being gay. Through a little experimenting we found that yes I do think my guy is really sexy when he’s my girl. Part of it is that it’s kind of sweet that he would do it to indulge me, part of it is he makes love entirely differently when he is wearing panties. We’ve started channeling that into our regular sex and I am now glad to say that he gets me off regularly even without the lingerie. I figured once that happened we had seen the last of the dressing but for Valentines day (which we celebrated last weekend) he rented a red maid’s dress and waited on me hand,foot and other areas too. It was so sweet. Just wanted to say thanks for saving my love life.


…why is your column no longer published in Pulse magazine in the niagara area.we can’t stand the dan savage column and miss your column, style, humour, etc an incredible amount. please come back!!


…Hi Josey – just a short note to tell you how much I enjoy your column. I’m 70 years old and I believe your advice is better than Anne Landers (used to be) and Annie’s mailbox. I hope all the young people who read your column follow your advice. My son Robert, who knows you from Concordia, still reads your column from Seattle. Keep up the good work.


…I am almost 70 yrs old and enjoy your news letter, it always give me a laugh. I have always said if you can laugh at life and your self then all is OK.. You keep writing and I will keep enjoying.

Dick, Floyds Knobs, IN

…Hi, I am 24, and finishing university. I just read your column on teenage
sexuality and found it fascinating (MMB, Girls Only). I think that discussing teenage sex is important, and not just the negative aspects, as you pointed out in your article.

In high school, none of my friends were rushing to have sex, and most who
did while we were in high school did so with a long-term boyfriend
(generally dating at least a year). We were all comfortable talking about
sex long before we ever “did it”, thanks to “The Sunday Night Sex Show”,
Cosmopolitan, and various other sources of information. That made my first
time at 18 go much more smoothly, since even though I was dating a much
older guy (he was 26), I was comfortable enough with him (and myself) to sit down and talk about STIs, protection, and what we would do if I got
pregnant. Although I won’t be a virgin when I get married next summer, I am marrying the only guy that I have ever slept with, which is something I am immensely proud of.

I think putting more information out there about the emotional side of
relationships and sex can only help teens, since we all know about the
health issues, and mechanics, but not everyone can talk openly about the
intimacy of sex and how it might affect teenage relationships. I was
fortunate to have a summer job from the age of 13 to 19 where I worked with girls who were 6-10 years older than me, and who shared all sorts of useful (and titillating) information, and I think everyone should have that
opportunity (especially for girls, who are certainly indoctrinated with the
“sex is bad” chant).

Thanks for bringing it up, and hopefully in the future, teenage sexuality is
more openly discussed.



…Hi Josey, I am a mature student here at St-Lawrence College in Kingston and was in attendance at your lecture on Feb 15/06. I just thought I’d drop you a line to let you know how much I enjoyed it. I think it’s great that kids today have the opportunity to attend lectures such as these. While you were talking, I looked around the room and could see how much fun the audience was having and heard many good comments afterwards. My daughter will be attending Brock University this year and I hope that she has the opportunity to see one of your lectures. I think what you do is very important and hope you continue with the good work.


…Hi Josey, I just wanted to thank you and congratulate you again on the wonderful Talk you did last week at Waterloo (dispite AV hassles and a rushed ending). I have had numerous comments about how much students enjoyed your presentation and disappointments from those who couldn’t attend.

It was great meeting you and Perry, and I know that we will have to
have you back again.

Thanks Josey!

Jennifer Diebolt, organizer, University of Waterloo


…Hiya Josey!

With all that’s happened to me since last Wednesday, I almost forgot
that I really wanted to write you.

I just happened to be in my car last Wednesday morning and I caught your interview on 102.1

It’s unfortunate that you had to suffer through the complete idiocy of what passes for a morning crew on that station. I never really cared much for that show. But what I heard that morning confirmed what I already thought and I doubt I’ll put myself through that kind of pain again.

As bad as it was, you maintained professionalism and you should be recognized for being able to do so under such extreme conditions.

I can say with conviction that the “Cyber” world isn’t missing anything with the absence of idiots like that crew.

I would have loved to have heard your perspective on “Internet” based trysts, fantasies and relationships. Too bad your “hosts” lacked both the intelligence and imagination to see “Cyber” for what it can be.
It’s also too bad that any resemblance of professional skill, talent or couth.

In any case, it was cool to hear you on the radio.

Take care, and good luck with future interviews. 🙂



—— Forwarded Message
From: “Michael”
Date: Thu, 1 Dec 2005 21:51:34 -0600
To: matt


I happened to be “channel surfing” and came across “MY MESSY BEDROOM”!
I must tell you that I was absolutely impressed at the quality, frankness, and “down-to-earthness”
of this wonderful program!


…Greetings Josey, I just wanted to take a minute & say hey…
I recently discovered Free Speech TV here in the U.S….which is where I
have come across “My Messy Bedroom”. Very cool show…very, very cool. I have only seen 2 or 3 episodes but enjoy what I have seen very much.
For demographic purposes, lol, I will just add that I am a 45yo, single guy
(never married, but recently ended a 16 year live-in relationship), no
children, employed, lol, musician-type (not sure if I should say that or
not, lol), liberal…
Great show…you can be certain I will write to FSTV & put in my 2 cents…& I’m sure I’ll be joining your community sometime this weekend.
Take care & be good,

David, Denver, Colorado

…I love you girls-I am a night-owl and I watch your show at3:00AM-in the states-now tell me, the shows are from 2001-2002-aren’t you making new shows or can’t I get them here-you girls are a howl-thanks for talking about all of the things I need to know


…Hey Josey, Just wanted to let you know, I probably would be considered a “conservative” by most of my peers. However, I enjoy yourMessy BedroomTV show very much. You have a dandy way of making things that so many women feel taboo about approachable. So many of the women I date make love like their dead granny’s are watching them. But your showmakes me realize that stereotyping ain’t cool.



…I emailed FSTV and told them they can’t mess with MMB.
I’ll go insane without it!!!
Thanks for your great show.


…My name is keith and I have been watching your show on fstv and I’ve really enjoyed it, so I did some searching around (maybe not at the right places) to find your episodes for purchase and have come up with nothing, and I assume if they were you’d have them diplayed on your website, so will your show’s ever be for sale?


Keith: We’ve considered this and have even discussed the idea. We’re certainly not adverse but it is quite an effort and an initial expense so we’d have to know the interest was there before doing it, which in itself is a lot of work. But it’s one of the balls we’re juggling so we’ll be sure and let you know if you we do go ahead with releasing the MMB-TV series on DVD or webcast or something! Meantime, feel free to let us know if this is something you’d be interested in paying money ‘fer folks. Drop us a line at:


…Hey Josey, just wanted to give you some feedback. I lent your book toa friend and she just loved it. Couldn’t stop talking about it….

Stephanie Mitelman, certified sexuality educator


(read the column that did it)

…I am writing to express my support for Josey Vogels and My Messy Bedroom. Having sex-positive and tell-it-like-it-is voices in the media is so important, especially as more and more mainstream media slip into the rut of exploitation.Josey is a smart woman whose voice should be welcomed by your paper, not quieted.You were the first Canadian daily to run her column. That took guts. I invite you to use those same innards and stand behind her while not bowing to those calling for her blood.

Warmest Regards
Trevor Mills

…I just found out that The Halifax Daily News has decided to drop My Messy Bedroom because of a column about the Globe and Mail oral sex story. I do not understand The Daily News’ decision. The offending column is a sober comment on the topicand on the G&M’s alarmist story.Josey Vogels was doing what she does best: telling it like it is, with humour and without judgement. In so doing, Ms. Vogels rendered a service to your readers.Surely your readership is intelligent and mature enough to read about oral sex and does not need to be protected by your newspaper.

The Halifax Daily News showed courage in becoming the first Canadian daily to run My Messy Bedroom.The decision to support a sex-positive voice was that of a progressive newspaper. This latest decision is regressive and demonstrates no courage whatsoever.It is a disservice to your readers.


Charles Faubert

…I’m writing to urge you not to drop Josey Vogels’ My Messy Bedroom column from the Halifax News. Vogels is one of the freshest and most irreverant voices in Canadian journalism. Her columns are witty, topical and of course controversial. I’ve read the column in question and found it to be refreshing and insightful. In fact, I found it less offensive than a recent Globe and Mail feature story on the same subject. The Globe feature was alarmist and sensationalist, more appropriate to the Toronto Sun or a tabloid paper. I found Vogels take on the subject farm more measured and intelligent.


Andrew Munger
Ultramagnetic Productions Ltd.

…Personally I am disappointed that a Canadian daily would take a cowardly way out of a topic that needs greater discussion and candidness. Youth of today is bombarded with highly sexualized messages on television, films, books, magazines to name but a few. It should come as no surprise that they are sexually active as “early” as they are. Instead of dealing with this topic in a shame-based fashion, it would be so much more useful to bring it out in the open and talk to today’s youth. Today the health risks are greater than they were a generation ago and silence=denial which = greater incidence to STI transmission and keeping it secret. In a society that is more sexually positive (which BTW does not constitute promiscuity), in a society where children are taught to see themselves, their bodies and their genitals as sacred, to see sex as something God given and sacred, we might see less casual sex and “fly-by-fellatio” behaviour. This positive approach can only begin with open, frank discussion. Sex, sexual expression is part of being human. Put away your own baggage and create an opportunity where the next generation can grow up healthier, happier and more sane. Be part of the solution not part of the greater problem which is pleasure/sexual negative.

Laila McDaniels
Sexuality Educator

…I just wanted to send you a quick note about your recent decision to drop My Messy Bedroom from your paper. I read Josey’s “offending” article and was amazed at the honesty and genuine challenge Ms. Vogel’s sets out. I too read the Globe and Mail article and ruminated along my way to work, as I passed by high schools “what’s going on with the kids these days?!” After reading Josey’s piece, I feel a bit less like the world is going to hell in a hand-basket and relieved to have some of my beliefs about the inherent dangers of young sex challenged. As a feminist, I am can’t tell you how valuable it is to see some of the female agency represented in this “problem”. Really, let’s consider this from all angles and not punish women with moxy like Josey who are willing to bring a female and feminist perspective to issues of sexuality. I urge you to reinstate her article in your paper.

Chanelle Gallant, Manager, Good for Her. Toronto


…Josey Vogel’s candor and intelligence provides a refreshing antidote to the alarmist and regressive attitudes that surround sex education, and women’s sexuality in particular…


Cass King
Womyns’Ware Inc.
Vancouver, BC

…Josey Vogels progressive and indeed accurate articles are an important perspective on contemporary gender roles, sexuality, mores, and health issues….

Shawna Dempsey and Lorri Millan

… In a society that has over time made sex and all its myriad facets a great dirty thing, MMB and Josey Vogels’ sex-positive views are refreshing and needed progress towards healthy and enlightened options about how we view and treat sex….

Shaun Proulx, Editor,

…With all the misinformation, and even hysteria, around sex, Josey Vogels offers a sane, respectful, and funny woman’s voice in the wilderness….

Elana Wright

… Josey Vogels is an incisive, sensitive and witty commentator on sexual & social mores and the relationship between and among the sexes in our time….

James Cullingham
President, Tamarack Productions, Toronto

Coordinator of Journalism-Broadcast,

The School of Communication Arts, Seneca College, Toronto

…whatever the goal – be it stopping the spread of STDs, reducing teen pregnancies, promoting healthier relationships or simply pointing out that sexual pleasure is a gift each human being is entitled to give and receive – requires a safe place to discuss the topic from as many angles as there are positions in the Kama Sutra. Josey Vogel’s My Messy Bedroom column is just such a place….

Jowi Taylor