Metro Toronto

Sex and the Civility


Metro Toronto, July 12, 2004

Please and thank you can go a long way — especially in bed.

In her new book, Bedside Manners: Sex Etiquette Made Easy , sex and dating columnist Josey Vogels gives readers the same advice mothers have been giving for years — mind your manners.

“[Sex] comes down to the basic tenets of good behaviour,” Vogel says. “Know yourself. Know what you like so you know what to ask for. And then treat others the way you’d like to be treated.”

Vogels, born and raised just outside Toronto in a strong Catholic family, started writing about sex a decade ago with her first column, My Messy Bedroom . Since then, she has begun writing a second nationally syndicated dating column, Dating Girl , and has written five books on the subject.

Vogels says she began writing her first column at a time when women were starting to talk about their sexual prowess and the media were slowly beginning to realize the trend.

“(The column) tapped into something that people were beginning to feel,” Vogels says. “It was right before Sex And The City , and it was just time.”

Now, with her new book and 10 years of column experience and research to draw from, Vogels has chosen a fun yet frank format to get people talking about what goes on between the sheets.

“There’s a lot of ritual around sex, but because we are so embarrassed about it, we don’t talk about it,” Vogels says. “So we kind of fumble our way through, and we’re expected to just kind of know what we’re doing.”

Enter Bedside Manners. In a book that covers everything from first-time sex to multiple partners, Vogels has created a humorous yet informative read. With its historical sex facts and entertaining stories of sexual encounters, the book is less of a guide and more of a starting point to get people talking about sex.

Perhaps not entirely fit as a coffee-table book, it is worth keeping on hand to share with friends.

Copyright (c) 2004, Metro